Coontz traces the slide of the family toward subjectivism.

It isn't Individualism that destroyed family privacy and family life,

rather privacy and family life was created by Individualism.

Because of Individualism, emotional life and obligation became private.

The nuclear family became the ideal - the source of duty and altruism.

1870s-1890s and again in 1970s-1990s.

Enlightenment valued public values (contract and obligation) more than private life.

The good citizen should have a passion for public good.

Private preoccupations should be transformed into civic responsibility

Women were to foster morality in general - not just their family.

Men were to take responsibility for women and children in general - not just ther family.

The family was NOT seen as primarily responsible for checking selfish individualism and

creating virtuous citizens.

In the US, there were restraints on Individualism:

1. People felt a personal responsibility for conversion and social reform.

2. There was a promotion of equality, cooperation and community.

Honor and virtue were considered civic altruism.

Happiness and self-reliance meant collective virtue.

3. Material conditions - the market was a face to face situation, and personal.

4. Public and private life was not separated.

Women formed Reform Societies

Charity Organizations

Missionary Work

Temperance Groups

After the Civil War, this changed.

Domesticity began to be confined to the home and nuclear family.

Women's sphere became their own families.

Private family became the center of morality and personal identity.

There was a cultivation of private families, and

a repudiation of larger social and political obligations.

They turned away from political activism.

After the Civil War ended, and the Reform Government fell, civic responsibility also fell.

1. Many became millionaires. They lived an ostentatious life style.

2. Poverty developed. Many people had mortgage debts.

Popular opinion had it that you should not give to the poor - it will keep them from

helping themselves.

So there was no public assistance for them.

Charity should go to public libraries and art.

Social Darwinism - Survival of the fittest.

40% of the workers lived below the poverty line.

45% hovered just above poverty line.

Families need an extra income - so children work.

Poverty was blamed on the lack of middle class family norms.

Slums were blamed on a disrespect for privacy.

3. Minorities fared poorly. KKK etc. and discrimination.

Black problems were blamed not on discrimination, but lack of discipline and morality.

4. Church membership grew.

But the focus narrowed - it became fundamental.

There was no political activism.

5. Those who could not live up to the idealized idea of family were condemned.

Pregnant mothers

Poor in need of assistance.

Middle class Family values became an alternative to the public example of wealth.

Family became a moral yardstick to measure the public realm.

So public life became inferior to the private life.

Previous public virtues became privatized.

Women's moral superiority became personal comportment, not social work.

Virtue became faithfulness

Chacter became personality.

These new family values meant that money could be spent on the home.

"Feed the community by feeding the family."

There was less participation in elections.

Morality became personal.

The same thing happened again in 1970-1990.

In 1967 45% believed that financial affluence is important.

In 1987=70%

In 1967 84% believe it is important to have a philosophy of life

In 1989 = 40%

In 1989 24% of youth believe improving the community is important

72% of youth say their main purpose in life is to be successful

67% say that children are not obligated to parents.

In 1990s a good citizen is on that is generous and caring -

NOT a voter, and politically involved.

The word intercourse, which means public communication, now means sex - private.

An effective adult in our society is Independent

Individualistic

Rational

Calculative

An effective family member is Sharing

Cooperative

Sacrificial

Non-rational.

We look to the family to teach children civic responsibility

duty

commitment

humility

authority

magnanimity

integrity

emotional maturity.

Obligation and reciprocity is found in the family, not in public life.

Family relations are the model for emotional relationships.

In 1980s and 1990s people called for a renewal of family life.

Donna Reed Show

Leave it to Beaver

My Three Sons

Father Knows Best

Reagan said "Private values must be at the heart of public policies."

Political failures become a break down of love.

We blame the family for failing to create justice and equality

Private actions become public scandals. Public figures are "dethroned" by private scandals.

Jim Jones, Clarence Thomas, Gary Hart, etc. Pres. Clinton

Groups are formed based on personal motivations

"I am not happy because of my family."

My society is not happy because of families.

Coontz contends that this view of private family values discourages mutual aid from others.

Family relationships are not a preparation for civic duty -

but a substitute for them.

"A halfway house" on the road to "me-first" individualism.

We feel incomplete because we lack the social element - try to fill all our needs in our family.

It impoverishes the public life.

It makes private relations more problematic.

TRADITIONAL FAMILY OF LEAVE IT TO BEAVER

Breadwinner father, fulltime homemaker mother, dependent children.

Today some estimate that less that 10% of the families are "traditional"

Others point out that only 1/2 mothers with pre-school children work full time.

There is a growing feeling that the problems in our society are a result of the break down of the family.

Coontz thinks that based on an idealized image of the family that biases what we see.

The idealization of the nuclear family occurred in the 1950s.

During the Depression it was difficult for everyone.

By 1947 6 million families were sharing housing (Newly married couples stayed with their parents.)

People began to prioritize the nuclear family.

The "modern family" became synonymous with young families on their own.

Other loyalties, and community ties were secondary

For the first time in history, the family was expected to fulfill everyone's needs.

Families in the 1950s look idealic on the surface.

Divorce was only 25%

Illegitimacy was half of today's rate

Family was thought to be the basic social institution

People married earlier, had more children - four was not uncommon

There were fewer never marrieds

There were no gangs

There was no problem with discipline at school

School levies almost always passed

It was a time of economic prosperity

By 1960, 62% owned their own homes (in 1940 = 43%)

85% of new homes were in suburbs

87% had TV

75% had car

60% had a middle class income - $3,000 - $10,000

The family became the focus of fun and recreation.

The house changed - became more informal, with family room.

The biggest consumer spending was on household furnishings and appliances - 240% increase.

Both men and women came to see themselves - their identity - in terms of the family.

Women felt guilty if they didn't do housework themselves

In the past - upper class had servants.

In the 1950s women actually spent MORE time, even though chores were easier.

Childcare took more time.

The image of the ideal man changed from a loner to a family man.

Women provided sex to keep him home (double standard)

Problems were thought to stem from a failure to create harmonious gender roles.

Americans said that the home and family is the "well spring" (source) of happiness

REALITY OF THE 1950s WAS DIFFERENT

1. Poverty - 25% of Americans were poor (40-50 mil)

There were no food stamps, and no government housing

65% of the elderly had incomes of $1000, and no medical insurance.

There were lots of immigrants from Mexico - more in 20 years than in 100 years previous.

They were virtually ignored.

Blacks moved to the North.

Their poverty rate was 50%

They couldn't move into the white neighborhood

They were discriminated against, and abused.

There were more Puerto Ricans in New York than in San Juan.

2. The Situation for Women

They worked during the war - Rosie the Riveteer

1/2 didn't want to quit after the war - income, prestige, activity

Many were downgraded to lower pay.

Working women were accused of "castrating" their men

Domineering mothers were blamed for children's problems

They were labeled schizophrenic if they couldn't balance the two

Studies of women treated with schizophrenia reveal treatment had to do with acceptance of domestic jobs

Women like Joan Crawford - who were not the household type - were expected to be idealic

mothers and householders.

Women were barred from juries, contracts, credit cards, and in some cases, family finances.

Single men were also considered deviant.

3. Repression - Families were seen as the front line defense against communism, etc.

An alternate life style was considered suspicious.

People monitored the books you read, the music you listened to, the people you talked to

Gays and lesbians married to avoid suspicion

Fears of delinquency of children were also blamed on the family

There was a narrower range of acceptable family behavior

Outside that range of activity, you were a target.

4. Abuse (sexual and other) and alcoholism - was not uncommon - but it was hidden.

Authorities were unaware, or unconcerned.

Young girls' reports of incest were regarded as fantasy.

At the same time, sex became used to sell consumer items.

5. Many marriages were unhappy - less than 1/3 were happily married.

People lived apart, or "toughed" it out.

Women's desires were secondary

They played dumb to get husbands

Tranquilizers were developed in the 1950s - mainly for women

Drinking increased for women - "Booze, Bowling, Bridge and Boredom"

Men complained of mindless conformity

6. Illegitimate sex increased.

The number of pregnant brides doubled

The age of marriage dropped

Teen births reached an ALL TIME high.

97 per 1,000 in 1957; 52 per 1,000 in 1983

Babies were put up for adoption

It was up to women to "put the brakes on" in a relationship.

In many ways, today's society is better off than anytime during the previous two centuries.

Only 20% of the children live in poverty today - 1/3 lived in poverty in 1960.

Only 26% of the dad's don't pay any child support - In 1920s they had no obligation to pay at all. In 1940s, 1/2 of the students finished high school. Today's drop out rate is much lower.

In 1930s, New York's homicide rate was much higher than in 1980

In 1820s alcohol abuse was 3X higher than it is today - plus they had opium and cocaine addictions.

Coontz's claim is that we have idealized the family, and blame it for society's problems.

But we have privatized the family - cut it off from the rest of society.

So the family members have no other source for happiness and support.

Values are a private matter - not public debate.

Religion is a private matter - not shared with others.

Responsibilities are not shared - so that family members who are less able cannot be helped.

The Real Modern Family is the Nuclear Family - Leave it to Beaver Family.

It developed from the individualism of the last century.

It further developed after WW II, when joint families were necessary because of Depression

economics.

The unique economic, social and political factors of the 1950s contributed to its spread.

And it doesn't work very well.

THE MYTH OF SELF-RELIANCE

Dependence on support outside the family has been the rule, not the exception.

Pioneers depended upon the skill of the Native Americans to make use of the produce from land.

Early American families were dependent on a large network of neighbors, church, courts, gov,

and legislature for sustenance.

Poor and disabled were cared for by famlies - not gov.

Poor family members were assigned to other families to be educated,etc.

Colonials borrowed and lent money without any problem.

"The presence of outstanding accounts assured the continuing circulation of goods,

services and social interaction through the community."

Owing favors, and being owed favors was a mark of success.

Colonial life was more corporate than individual.

The more modern equivalents were

Mercantile associations, credit-pooling consortia, corporations, limited liability partnerships,

Fraternal organizations, evangelical groups, maternal associations.

Neighborhoods were also important

Especially minority groups, or ethnic groups.

To find jobs, to find housing, to help in times of crisis (widows, orphans, injured)

Jobs were an important source of help

Workers held picnics, took collections for families in need

Godparents were important for Catholics, Mexican Americans, and Native Americans.

Public Assistance was always there.

Two examples: American West = and Suburban family of the 1950s

American West

Pioneers got land from the government at cheap prices - or homesteaded.

There were massive federal land grants,

And government funded military mobilizations that dispossessed land from Native Americans and Mexicans.

Federal funds were used for land rights, transportation options (RR), economic existence, water rights.

US gov spent $15 million on Louisiana Purchase.

US gov funded or guaranteed funding for 3/4 of $200 million to build canals into the Great Lakes.

US gov spent